BattleTech: The Animated Series/Well Bargained and Done

This transcript of the episode of BattleTech: The Animated Series, Well Bargained and Done, is based off a VHS recording from the initial airing.

Scene 1

[A Centurion patrols the arid, rocky wastelands of Dustball. A domed city rises on the horizon. In the city, on streets lit by flashing neon signs, Rachel Specter, Miles Hawkins, and Adam Steiner look for additional MechWarriors to join the First Somerset Strikers.]

Hawk: I could think of classier places to scare up MechWarriors than this armpit.

Adam: In case you forgot, every good pilot's busy fending off the invasion force.

Rachel: Which leaves us with nobody to fill out our unit.

Hawk: Except for the lowlife mercenaries who hang out on this Kerensky-forsaken rock.

[The trio stops to look at a massive tower decorated with towering statues and the name "Circus Tybus."]

Hawk: Tybus. Huh. Why is it the biggest crooks always stick their names on buildings.

Adam: I thought your intelligence division busted that hood.

Hawk: Yeah, but we never could make any of the charges stick.

[They hear the sound of gunfire.]

Adam: Come on! Sounds like trouble!

[Two men are firing rifles at small flying craft within the dome. Stray shots cause rubble to rain down on pedestrians on the sidewalk. Adam saves a child from being hit by a chunk of ferrocrete.]

Hawk: Clear the streets, people! SecurityMechs coming through.

[A Centurion approaches down the street. It ignites its jump jets and follows the flying craft as it crashes through the dome. As he descends from the apex of the jump, the pilot accurately targets the flying craft and brings it down in the wastelands.]

Valten Ryder: Leaving us so soon, Martinez?

[Ryder approaches the downed flyer on foot and pulls open the door, revealing Martinez slumped in the cockpit.]

Val: Room service not to your liking?

[Ryder handcuffs Martinez.]

Hawk: That was the craziest display of reckless 'Mech jockeying I've ever seen.

Adam and Rachel (together): That's our man!

Scene 2

["Boss" Tybus carries on a holo-conversation with Star Colonel Kristen Redmond from his office in the Circus Tybus.]

"Boss" Tybus: Lousy Feds. They got no regard for legitimate businessmen. Trying to shut me down. And over what? A few minor infractions?

Kristen: I am a warrior of Clan Jade Falcon. The dealings of the Merchant Caste are of no concern to me.

Tybus: My point, exactly. With you guys taking charge of this system, I'm thinking I can run things without undue interference. Plus, you get ten percent straight off the top. Off the books, of course.

Kristen: Hmmm. I will admit the idea of gaining a foothold in this sector intrigues me. Such a victory would earn great honor for my Galaxy Commander.

Tybus: So, we got a deal?

Kristen: A "deal"? You refer to a Trial of Possession for your planet, quiaff?

Tybus: Deal, trial, whatever you want to call it.

Kristen: What forces do you bid to defend it?

Tybus: What do you mean, "bid?" All I got is a lance of five 'Mechs.

Kristen: Very well. I shall use only two OmniMechs, and we will engage your forces at the hills due north of your city.

Tybus: Look, babe, all you gotta do is waltz in and I'll hand you the keys.

Kristen: You will address me as Star Colonel Kristen Redmond, quiaff.

Tybus: Sure, whatever. Um… aff?

Kristen: Well bargained and done.

[Valten Ryder enters with Martinez in tow.]

Val: What am I offered for one late-model FedRat spy, slightly damaged? How about an even trade, Tybus? Martinez for my BattleMech.

Tybus: Valten Ryder… You got some nerve bustin' in here unannounced. You think one lousy spy is enough to get your rig out of hock?

Val: Martinez had enough evidence on him to shut you down but good, Tybus.

[Ryder puts a holodisk on Tybus' desk. Tybus picks it up.]

Tybus: Didn't leave yourself much to bargain with, Ryder.

Val: How do you know I didn't make copies?

[Tybus glowers.]

Val: Oh, and, uh, have 'em wax it, will you? Ha! Nobody likes a dull 'Mech.

Scene 3

[Later, at the "One Armed Bandit" lounge, Valten puts holographic 'Mechs through duels with tabletop holo-simulator fights when he is approached by Adam.]

Adam: Valten Ryder?

Val: Might be. You owe him something?

Adam: Major Adam Steiner; Captain Miles Hawkins. First Somerset Strikers.

Val: Major Steiner, huh? You'd think the name could have bought you a better rank.

[Ryder wins his game against his opponent.]

Adam: Can we talk for a second?

Val: Pony up for a game, and you can talk all you want.

Adam: That was a very impressive display of 'Mech piloting this afternoon.

Val: Are you here to talk business, or are you just here to stroke my ego?

Hawk: We did some research on you, Val. Strong service record, but you got drummed out for insubordination.

Val: Heh heh heh. My CO couldn't cover his poker debts, so he gave me a dishonorable discharge. Serves me right for hustling the old man.

Adam: Look, I'm raising a unit to go after the force that's been invading the Inner Sphere. How would you like to rejoin the service as a Lieutenant?

Val: I gave up fighting for your relatives a long time ago.

Adam: Wait a minute. You think I'm talking about some little border dispute? This is the survival of the entire Inner Sphere!

Hawk: Easy, Major. This mercenary sleaze bag's not worth the effort.

[Ryder's Centurion destroys Adam's Axman. The game ends with a "MECH DESTROYED" notice.]

Val: Nice playing you, Major.

[The game displays "MECH SHUTDOWN" over Ryder's Centurion.]

Adam: Your 'Mech's overheating, pal. That strategy might work one-on-one, but you'd be a sitting duck in real combat.

[Ryder laughs and grabs a pile of C-bills on the table]

Val: You're right. I guess I'll just have to settle for real money.

Scene 4

[In Tybus' office, the scene shows Tybus has been watching Ryder's game through the security cameras in the One Armed Bandit]

Tybus: So, Ryder's taking bribes from FedRats, eh?

Aide: Hey, that's Captain Miles Hawkins, a FedCom Intelligence Secretariat operative. He busted that Drac smuggling operation last month. Now that's Major Adam Steiner. No intelligence record, but get this, he's a distant cousin to the Archon, Melissa Steiner.

Tybus: Royal blood makes a good bargaining chip. Keep him around. As for Ryder, I got one last job for him.

Scene 5

[That night, Ryder leads Tybus' BattleMech lance on patrol through the wastelands.]

Val: After this gig, Tybus can go suck an egg. Val Ryder's finally a free man!

[Two white streaks flash across the sky.]

Val: Hey, you guys see that? We better check this out.

[Meanwhile, back at the Kwaidan.]

Hawk: Quit wasting your time, schoolboy. You know, I'm beginning to think the best Mechjocks on this planet are either in jail or the graveyard.

Hawk: Welcome to Dustball.

[Rachel appears via holoemitter.]

Rachel: Adam, I'm picking up atmospheric disturbances near the southern mountains. Looks like two 'Mechs dropping from orbit. Their configurations match the troops that invaded Somerset.

[In the mess hall, Ciro and Kylie are eating together when Adam's voice comes over the intercom.]

Adam: Lieutenant Ramirez, Cadet Kylie, report to 'Mech bay on the double.

[Over the desert, two drop pods blaze with friction heat.]

Kristen: Commence combat drop landing.

[The ablative shells of the pods burst apart to reveal Kristen's Mad Dog and Pytor's Hunchback IIC. The Dustball lance approaches the drop zone.]

Val: What the devil?

Kristen: I am Star Colonel Kristen Redmond, of Clan Jade Falcon. Prepare to be destroyed. Initiating enhanced imaging.

[Kristen and Pytor engage the Dustball lance. Ryder tries to fire back, but his controls have been sabotaged. The rest of the Dustball lance retreats.]

Val: Hey, where are you going?

Dustball MechWarrior: Tybus says "lots of luck," FedRat traitor!

Kristen: Bah! Freeborn cowards! How dare they turn their backs on honorable combat?

Val: Computer, run a diagnostic on targeting and fire control systems.

Computer: System Error! System Error!

[Ryder's Centurion topples.]

Kristen: Kick hard, little freeborn warrior. Unlike your cowardly allies, you possess a warrior's heart.

Val: Couldn't we just say "old age."

[Kylie's Banshee strafes the Falcon 'Mechs.]

Kristen: Those forces were never bid!

Hawk: Great! So much for the element of surprise!

Adam: We need to soften them up while we're still out of their targeting range.

[A Falcon blast detonates amid the Strikers' formation.]

Ciro: You were saying?

[Rachel monitors from the DropShip.]

Rachel: Guys, according to my readouts, that salvo came 2.3 kilometers.

Ciro: That's three times our range.

Rachel: They're heading straight for you!

Adam: We need to close up that gap. Kylie, think you can lead them our way?

Kylie: I thought you'd never ask.

[The Strikers mass their fire on Pytor's Hunchback IIC.]

Kristen: Barbarians.

Hawk: How can they still be standing?!

Kristen: These Inner Sphere surats do not deserve a fair fight. We shall withdraw and wait for reinforcements. This entire pitiful planet will pay for their deception.

Ciro: Let's give those cowards a taste of Commonwealth steel!

Adam: Negative, Ciro. It took everything we have just to shake up those two. Who knows what else they've got out there waiting for us.

Hawk: Major, I've spotted a downed 'Mech.

Adam: Let's check it out. Ciro, Kylie, head back to the DropShip and wait for instructions.

Kylie: You guys have all the fun.

[Adam and Miles pry open Ryder's cockpit.]

Hawk: Well, if it ain't mister congeniality.

Val: Tybus… I'm gonna nail that sleaze bag.

Adam: Easy, buddy. We'll get you a MedTech.

Scene 6

[Aboard the Kwaidan, Sakamoto offers a pistol to Dr. Nakamura.]

Franklin: You will need this to protect yourself from the enemy.

Nakamura: The Major said the invaders retreated.

Franklin: I wasn't referring to the invaders.

[Nakamura takes a van marked with a yellow cross on a red-rimmed yellow circle – very similar to the MediQuick Services insignia - out to where Ryder's Centurion went down, and puts a brace on his leg.]

Nakamura: Just a fractured femur.

Val: If I knew they had such pretty MedTechs, I'd have broken something sooner.

Adam: Well, the offer to join us still stands.

Val: Can't say much for the pay, but I like the medical benefits.

Hawk: Didn't I tell you not to waste your time on this loser?

[Adam spots the pistol in Nakamura's bag.]

Adam: Are you carrying a weapon, doc?

Nakamura: Not by choice, I assure you. I realize this is a combat unit, but my job is to save lives, not take them.

[Nakamura hands the pistol to Adam, but drops it when an explosion rocks the truck. Ryder picks it up and sticks it in his pocket.]

UrbanMech Pilot: We know you're in there, Ryder!

Adam: Friends of yours?

[An UrbanMech sticks its gun barrel into the bed of the van.]

UrbanMech Pilot: You're all invited to enjoy the hospitality of Boss Tybus.

Scene 7

[The next day, Boss Tybus tries to smooth things over with Kristen Redmond via holo-communicator.]

Tybus: I swear, Star Colonel, I got no idea where those other 'Mechs come from.

Kristen: You have already sealed your fate with your deceitful trap, Tybus.

END TRANSMISSION

[The transmission cuts off as Tybus' guards bring the Strikers into his command center.]

Adam: So this is how you thank us for saving your planet.

Tybus: This is how I reward traitors for messing with my plans.

Val: You set me up! You slug rat!

[Tybus looks at Hawkins.]

Tybus: The raid. When? Where?

Hawk: Any idea what this guy's talking about?

Tybus: Don't mess with me, FedRat! I know who you're working for.

Adam: Captain Hawkins is no longer with the Intelligence Secretariat. He's with me.

Tybus: Nice try. Maybe you guys would like to get your stories straight with your partner.

[Tybus dismisses his guards and the prisoners. They are led into the cell where Martinez has been detained.]

Scene 8

Martinez: Ryder? And this used to be a classy establishment. Juan Martinez, FedCom Intelligence. I was about to nail Tybus when your buddy here shot me down. See, I found out Tybus was going to keep the FedCom off his back by striking a little deal with the Jade Falcon Clan.

Adam: Jade Falcon Clan?

Martinez: That's the name of the invasion force, Major Steiner.

Nakamura: You know who he is?

Martinez: I know a lot of things, Dr. Nakamura.

Adam: What do you know about Somerset?

Martinez: Not much, although my ComStar contact tells me your brother's alive.

Adam: Andrew? Alive?

Hawk: Fat lot of good that does us in here.

Martinez: I also know a FedCom battalion is waiting for my order to raid this planet, if I had some way to send them a signal.

[Ryder pulls the gun from his boot.]

Val: Too bad none of us has a key.

Nakamura: How did you…?

Val: I'll show you later, if you ask nicely.

[Ryder uses the laser pistol to blast open the cell door, and the group flees down the empty hallway.]

Martinez: There's a ComStar transmission center not too far from here. I can use it to contact my unit.

Val: If you're looking for your BattleMechs, they're this way.

Scene 9

[The Strikers enter the 'Mech bay and mount their rides. Ryder looks for his Centurion in vain.]

Val: I don't believe it! It's not here!

Adam: What's not here?

Val: My father's Centurion. Tybus was keeping it as collateral while I worked off my gambling debt.

Hawk: I never had you pegged as the sentimental type, Ryder.

[Tybus and his goons burst into the bay, guns drawn.]

Tybus: Come down from there, nice and slow. Where's Martinez?

[An explosion shakes the building.]

Hawk: It's all over, Tybus. His battalion's raiding this little rock right now!

Val: That quick? Impossible!

Adam: It must be that Jade Falcon Clan.

OmniFighters strafe the domed city and an Overlord disgorges OmniMechs, then lands. Citizens run screaming through the streets.]

Ciro [via communicator]: It's definitely the Falcon Clan, and this time they're not pulling punches.

Kristen: [laughs] Now Tybus and his kind shall reap the wages of their sins.

Adam: Call off your goons, Tybus. We're your only hope.

Tybus: No! We had a deal!

[Explosions rock the 'Mech bay. Tybus' guards flee.]

Hawk: Sounds like the deal's off.

Adam: How about it, Tybus?

Tybus: All right, you win.

[Tybus reaches into his coat pocket and withdraws a communicator, which he throws to Adam.]

Adam: Rachel! Adam. I need Ciro and Kylie out in the field pronto. We'll link up at coordinates 834476.

Rachel: I roger that, Adam. They're already on the job.

[The Banshee and Wolfhound deploy from the Kwaidan. Clan OmniFighters continue to strafe the city. Tybus tries to crawl away unnoticed as the Strikers climb ladders to their cockpits, but runs into Ryder's legs. Ryder holds a gun to Tybus' head.]

Val: Not so fast, boss man. You and me got a score to settle.

Adam: Val, wait! This is no time for vendettas! Innocent people are suffering.

Val: This is Dustball. Nobody's innocent!

[Tybus crawls backwards and touches a door control to open the bay containing Ryder's Centurion.]

Tybus: Recognize it? It's yours, if you let me go.

Val: You're not exactly in a position to bargain, pal.

Adam: Go ahead, Val. Pull the trigger. Prove you're a heartless lowlife, just like him. You already gave him your 'Mech, why not just give him your soul?

[Ryder waves the gun at the door, taking it away from pointing at Tybus.]

Val: Get out!

[Ryder turns back to Adam]

Val: You had to take the fun out of it, didn't you?

Hawk: Let's go, schoolboy. Daylight's wasting.

Scene 10

[OmniFighters continue to bomb the city as the Strikers' 'Mechs emerge from the 'Mech Bay]

Adam: All right, listen to me, Strikers. Those Clan 'Mechs have been baking in the sun for hours. Draw them away from the city, run them ragged. They'll overheat! Rachel, have you got an estimate of how long and how fast?

Rachel: Already working on it.

[The Clan forces advance on the city.]

Kristen: All units, initiate Enhanced Imaging.

Rachel: Adam, it shouldn't take long. Keep them moving at 50 km/h for five minutes and they should shut down.

Adam: We may not outgun them, but we can try to outlast them. Let's move!

Rachel: Adam! I'm picking up a stray Clan 'Mech. It's heading straight for you!

[A Timber Wolf sneaking up on Adam's Axman is itself shot from behind and goes down as Ryder's Centurion approaches.]

Val: Captain Valten Ryder reporting for duty, sir.

Adam: Captain?

Val: This is the firing line, Major. Are you really in a position to haggle?

Hawk: Just give it to him, Major. Trust me, Captain is no big deal.

Adam: All right, "Captain," you've got the command of the Medium Lance.

Val: Great. Where are they?

Adam: Well, actually, you're it.

Ciro: I salute you on your strategy, Major. Now my 'Mech's overheating!

Computer: Heat Warning. Fusion plant shutdown imminent.

Rachel: I don't get it, Adam. According to my calculations, some Clan 'Mechs should have given out by now.

Adam: Then change your calculation, and add one more item to the list of improved Clan equipment.

Hawk: My heat's through the roof. I'm toast! It's either punch out and surrender or stand here and get slaughtered. What's it gonna be, Major?

Adam: Tell me this isn't a mirage!

[Roughly 24 spheroid DropShips appear on Adam's scopes.]

Martinez: Major Steiner, Captain Martinez. Do you require assistance?

[The DropShips ground and begin disgorging 'Mechs.]

Kristen: More barbarians to destroy for the glory of Clan Jade Falcon.

[In orbit, a Jade Falcon WarShip opens communications.]

Nicolai: Star Colonel Kristen Redmond, you are to cease this unauthorized campaign at once.

Kristen: Spare us your petty jealousy, Nicolai! Was it not enough to steal all the glory for yourself on Somerset?

Nicolai: You have been ordered to pull out!

Kristen: On whose authority?

Vandervahn Chistu: On my authority.

Kristen:<gasp> Vandervahn Chistu!

Vandervahn: I gave no clearance for this operation. There is but one thing more odious than insubordination. Failure!

[The Falcon forces withdraw.]

Kylie: Hey, guys. They're turning tail.

Hawk: You lucked out, schoolboy. You didn't have to make the tough call, this time.

Scene 11

[The Strikers board their DropShip. Dr. Nakamura visits Sakamoto in his quarters, and tosses the gun on the floor.]

Nakamura: Perhaps next time you can give me something more useful, like a lock pick?

Scene 12

[The Kwaidan boosts for orbit.]

Rachel: So, we leave Dustball with a new Striker and some valuable intelligence. That's not bad for a Kerensky-forsaken rock, huh, Captain?

Hawk: I hate to think where we'd be if it weren't for Martinez.

Adam: He said my brother Andrew's alive.

Hawk: It's a long way to Somerset, Major, but we'll make it.